“Bah, humbug!” No, that’s too strong
‘Cause it is my favorite holiday
But all this year’s been a busy blur
Don’t think I have the energy

To add to my already mad rush
Just ’cause it’s ’tis the season.
The perfect gift for me would be
Completions and connections left from

Last year, ski shop,
Encounter, most interesting.
Had his number but never the time
Most of ’81 passed along those lines.

So deck those halls, trim those trees
Raise up cups of Christmas cheer,
I just need to catch my breath,
Christmas by myself this year.

Calendar picture, frozen landscape,
Chilled this room for twenty-four days,
Evergreens, sparkling snow
Get this winter over with!

Flashback to springtime, saw him again,
Would’ve been good to go for lunch,
Couldn’t agree when we were both free,
We tried, we said we’d keep in touch.

Didn’t, of course, ’til summertime,
Out to the beach to his boat, could I join him?
No, this time it was me,
Sunburn in the third degree.

Now the calendar’s just one page
And, of course, I am excited
Tonight’s the night, but I’ve set my mind
Not to do too much about it.

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I’ll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I’ll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I’ll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I’ll miss this one this year.

Hardly dashing through the snow
Cause I bundled up too tight
Last minute have-to-do’s
A few cards, a few calls
‘Cause it’s R-S-V-P
No thanks, no party lights
It’s Christmas Eve, gonna relax
Turned down all of my invites.

Last fall I had a night to myself,
Same guy called, Halloween party,
Waited all night for him to show,
This time his car wouldn’t go,

Forget it, it’s cold, it’s getting late,
Trudge on home to celebrate
In a quiet way, unwind
Doing Christmas right this time.

A&P has provided me
With the world’s smallest turkey
Already in the oven, nice and hot
Oh damn! Guess what I forgot?

So on with the boots, back out in the snow
To the only all-night grocery,
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
In the line is that guy I’ve been chasing all year!

“I’m spending this one alone,” he said.
“Need a break; this year’s been crazy.”
I said, “Me too, but why are you…
You mean you forgot cranberries too?”

Then suddenly we laughed and laughed
Caught on to what was happening
That Christmas magic’s brought this tale
To a very happy ending!

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn’t miss this one this year

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
Don’t want a doll, no dinky Tinker Toy
I want a hippopotamus to play with and enjoy

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
I don’t think Santa Claus will mind, do you?
He won’t have to use our dirty chimney flue
Just bring him through the front door,
That’s the easy thing to do

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
Creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
To see a hippo hero standing there

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles, no rhinoceroses
I only like hippopotamuses
And hippopotamuses like me too

Mom says a hippo would eat me up, but then
Teacher says a hippo is a vegeterian

There’s lots of room for him in our two-car garage
I’d feed him there and wash him there and give him his massage

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
Creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
To see a hippo hero standing there

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles or rhinoceroseses
I only like hippopotamuseses
And hippopotamuses like me too!

Take back the holly and mistletoe
Silver bells on string
If I wrote a letter to Santa Claus,
I would ask for just one thing.
I don’t need sleigh rides in the snow,
Don’t want a Christmas that’s blue.
Take back the tinsel, stockings, and bows,
‘Cause all I want for Christmas is you

I don’t need expensive things
They don’t matter to me
All that I want, it can’t be found
Underneath the Christmas tree

You are the angel atop my tree
You are my dream come true
Santa can’t bring me what I need
‘Cause all I want for Christmas is you

I don’t need expensive things
They don’t matter to me
All that I want, it can’t be found
Underneath the Christmas tree

You are the angel atop my tree
You are my dream come true (dream come true)
Santa can’t bring me what I need
‘Cause all I want for Christmas is you
‘Cause all I want for Christmas is you
‘Cause all I want for Christmas is you